Happy Love Life
Program
Improve connection
by being yourself
Improve connection
by being yourself
✓ You are frustrated because you don’t know how to overcome differences between you and your partner.
✓ You get stuck in conflict or distance.
✓ You postpone addressing things which gives you tension and resentment.
✓ You feel lonely when your partner retreats, or you tend to retreat yourself.
✓ You take responsibility for how your partner feels and don’t take care of your own needs, which leaves you depleted.
✓ The intimacy and your sex life isn’t great, which makes you feel less worthy.
✓ You are exhausted from having constant doubts about the relationship.
✓ You are frustrated because you don’t know how to overcome differences between you and your partner.
✓ You get stuck in conflict or distance.
✓ You postpone addressing things which gives you tension and resentment.
✓ You feel lonely when your partner retreats, or you tend to retreat yourself.
✓ You take responsibility for how your partner feels and don’t take care of your own needs, which leaves you depleted.
✓ The intimacy and your sex life isn’t great, which makes you feel less worthy.
✓ You are exhausted from having constant doubts about the relationship.
AND I get why it’s hard to create a good relationship
We simply never learned how to do that, resulting in a divorce rate that in most countries is up to 50%.
What I would love for you to hear is this: whatever the situation in your current relationship, it is not your fault.
It is not your fault that you haven’t learned in school how to create harmony after a fight.
It’s not your fault that you may not have had parents that showed you how to bridge differences in a relationship.
The lack of education in the past about how to have a great relationship is out of our hands.
What is in your control, is what you decide to do next.
You can learn how to have an amazing relationship. I’ve seen this with all of my clients, even the ones that didn’t have any hope.
The only thing you need is…
Nonviolent Communication is the most effective tool for relationships that I’ve found.
I’ve done extensive research on the best way to translate this method into simple, doable action, and have done countless interviews with you to create a system that actually works for you.
This has resulted in the Happy Love Life Program.
With this program you will:
I’ve also noticed how some partners can have resistance to support from a professional. Therefore, I’ve made the program in such a way that it is just as effective when you join alone, or when your partner joins only for parts of the program.
NVC is a model and every model has its limitations. To account for that I have added a few other methods that I find essential for love relationships.
All in all, this is the only relationship program based on NVC that can be done fully from your own home, has one-on-one support, and has been proven successful for both those who are in a relationship crisis and those who just want to improve their connection.
This consists of videos and exercises that will teach you the relationship and communication skills that you need. You can do these in the safety and the privacy of your own home, at your own pace. The communication formula is the product of years of study and experience with couples. After following them, you are no longer dependent on a relationship therapist in the future.
In the Telegram app group specifically setup for my students. Ask any questions you have or bring in a case and I will guide you further every day of the working week. This way you will never need to wait until the next lesson if you’re stuck. It’s also great to build connection with the group.
During the live calls you’ll practice all the skills you’ve learned in the modules and get feedback. You can experiment in a safe environment. Before each session, you can send in your case and Cara Crisler will coach you on your specific situation. She will also regularly let you practice in break-out groups. We hear time and time again from students that they learn tons from each other’s cases and being coached one on one in the group setting.
A practice buddy is a student from this course who you can set up calls with to:
A lot of people say this is the most valuable part of the course. Often times practice buddies stay connected for life! If you don’t have time for a buddy, don’t worry, you can opt out of this.
TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF
How to know what you feel and need, how to have self-empathy, and how to become your own primary caretaker.
COMMUNICATION DON’TS
Find out which things don’t work when you are expressing or listening to your partner, and what to do instead.
BRIDGING DIFFERENCES
Know how to find connection and make decisions when you have different preferences and opinions, due to culture, character, background..
LISTENING SO YOUR PARTNER OPENS UP
Learn how to create safety for someone to open up – even when your partner is not used to that.
ASKING EFFECTIVELY
Find out how to make requests that are likely to bring connection and cooperation – also if you are scared to ask for things.
HAVING HEALTHY CONFLICTS
Discover how to navigate disagreements in a way that fully resolves them – no resentment left.
SAYING ‘NO’ IN A CONNECTING WAY
Learn how to say no in a way that is easier to hear for the other person, so that you are more likely to express boundaries.
OVERCOMING A SHUT-DOWN
Find out what to do when one of you tends to walk away or retreat in silence when things are challenging.
BONDING WITHOUT WORDS
Learn how to create connection in other ways than speaking, so that you have different options at all times.
EXPERIENCING MORE LOVE & APPRECIATION
Cultivating the habit of expressing appreciation + finding what makes you feel loved and asking for this.
MOVING PAST DOUBTS ABOUT THE RELATIONSHIP
Get clarity on what your doubts are really about, and how you can embrace and overcome them.
SEX AND INTIMACY
Finding what you need in terms of sex and touch in general, and learning how to talk about it and put things into action.
Over the past years I’ve trained hundreds of people from the US, the Netherlands and other countries. I also own the biggest Youtube channel about NVC worldwide.
Although my background is in NVC, I’ve learned about most of the common techniques for guidance in relationships.
I focus all of my work on people’s love relationship because this is what I most love doing and what I’m best at.
I can’t wait to share my tools with you and let you experience an amazing love life!
She learned NVC after moving from the States to the Netherlands. ‘It helped me most in unlearning old patterns, like pleasing and avoiding conflict. It helped me learn how to be in tune with me, true to myself while staying in connection with important people in my life. I now apply it in all of my relationships: as a partner, mother, friend, colleague and perhaps the most important one of all, the one I have with myself.’
Same sex relationships and straight relationships
Monogamous and polyamorous relationships
New relationships
35+ years together relationships
LAT or long distance relationships
Intercultural and interracial relationships
No kids
With young kids
Kids left the house
MY PARTNER WILL NEVER WANT TO LEARN ALL THESE TOOLS.
It takes only one person in the relationship to change the dynamic. When you change your communication, this works like a hacksaw with your partner. I’ve seen amazing relationship transformations from one person changing their mindset and communication.
Maybe you think: well, why do I have to change? Why can’t my partner change? Good question. And the answer is: you want to improve your relationship for you, not for your partner.
If you want something different, you need to take the steps to make it happen. And often I’ve seen it’s one person in the relationship that has the courage and clarity to do this. Don’t stop yourself from getting the relationship you want only because you are waiting for the other person to do something.
I AM TOO BUSY RIGHT NOW…
I get it. And yes, you do need to put in some time to make the program work: it takes about one hour a week. But I did design the program in such a way that you can tailor it to your circumstances. Are you very full? Just come to the live calls. This is where I help you personally with your case. You have lifetime access to the videos, so you can watch those at your own pace.
Do you have a bit more time? Watch the videos, do the exercises and participate actively in the Facebook Group. You can ask me questions there every day of the working week. All in all, you can adjust depending on your energy each week what you choose to participate in. It will be a relaxing and rewarding experience.
Oh and everything you learn during the course will save you so much time and so much energy!
WHAT IF I’M NOT GOOD AT THIS?
Maybe you have an image of yourself as not good at standing up for yourself. Or a label that you are ‘too aggressive’. I’m here to tell you that you don’t need to change. When you learn to judge yourself less and take care of what you need, that is what will reflect in the relationship.
Also, this program is not like school: there are no exams or grades…this is all for your benefit. And I know that people only learn when things are fun. So I made the program in such a way that it is joyful and inspiring to follow. I love humor and lightness and if you haven’t laughed out loud at least once with me during this program I will give you a refund!
I DON’T HAVE THE MONEY…
Consider this: the health of our relationships determines how we feel about our life. We may have a great job and nice friends, but if the time with our partner sucks…our life sucks! Most of us just want to have a strong bond with someone and grow old together happily..it’s these strong, safe bonds that help us to be our best in all other areas of our life.
The investment for this course is nothing compared to that of an individual or relationship therapist. This is waaay more cost effective! And the investment for your life is so worth it..you will get that back: in time, energy, in joy..
Typically, therapy sessions cost anywhere between $150-$250/ session, with the expectation of a minimum of 3 months (around $1,800 – $3,000 or more). Plus babysitting. Plus, those sessions don’t come with a satisfaction guarantee. The Happy Love Life Program does.
I CAN DO THIS BY MYSELF
Yes, you can read books and watch Youtube videos to improve your relationship. But to really implement everything, is a whole different story. You need to know what things to start with and in what order to go. You need to actually DO things differently. You need to know what to do when you try something with your partner and then they don’t react the way you expected.
Happy Love Life is designed in a specific order that guarantees results. I help you with weekly exercises to actually act in a new way. And I know what to do with whatever reaction your partner gives – so we can tackle things together. That way you see progress fast and certain and you ensure not to make things worse.
Some partners don’t have a positive experience with getting professional support for their development – relationships or otherwise. On top of that, especially men have also often heard that they need to toughen up and figure things out by themselves. This might lead to resistance to learn relationship skills from a professional. In such a case it doesn’t help to try to convince the partner. What is needed is an approach for creating safety with your partner to explore what works for them and how to combine that with what works for you. I’m teaching you how to do this with this simple manual.
If there has been infidelity both partners need some extra support. This bonus can be done before all the other learnings. It will help you work through anger and guilt, will create healing, and build trust again.
Your partner can join for free!
See FAQ for the prices in your currency.
When does the program start?
The Standard version of the program is ongoing, you can join anytime.
The Premium version starts several times a year, the next one starts on the 23rd of January 2025.
How does it work when we join as a couple?
When you join as a couple you pay once. You both get access to the modules and Telegram Group. You can watch the videos together or each on your own, that is up to you. There are exercises that are helpful to do together, which will be indicated.
How does it work when I join by myself?
All the modules are set up in a way that you can do the entire program by yourself. When you communicate differently, your relationship will already improve. In theory you can even do the program without your partner knowing about it. If you want to try out things before trying them on your partner, I can ‘play’ your partner so we simulate the situation.
If you don’t have a partner at the moment, the same thing applies. We can work with examples from the past and potential future situations to prepare you for a new love life.
Where does Happy Love Life take place?
Everything is online — no travel, babysitter or even pants are required. You have access to the training for at least five years and probably longer, so you can go through the materials each week as they’re released in the member’s area, or you can slow things down and work at your own pace.
How much time do I need to commit?
If you plan to work through the program in real time, we recommend about one hour a week. If you’re not able to carve out that much time at first, don’t worry. You get at least 5 years access to the program and it’s available for you to work at your own pace. A lot of people who take the course have families and often full-time jobs – it’s designed to work for you.
Can’t I do a shorter program?
I know there are shorter programs offered for love relationships. They say you can improve your relationship in, say, 3 months. I believe that many relationships indeed can be improved in 3 months, but not in a way that you will maintain the results by yourself afterwards. I wish for you to only have to put the time and money once, and do it well, rather then to take short investments here and there and never really see great results. So Happy Love Life is a complete program that creates deep improvements and empowers you to stay on track after the program as well.
How does the Telegram Group work?
You get an invitation link to the group when you sign up for the course. The group is private, which means only people from our courses can access it. You can ask questions about the modules, bring in a case, share celebrations, connect with others.. You will need to join Telegram first if you don’t already use it. It works the same as a Whatsapp group.
If you have no experience with Telegram, I will guide you through it – no worries!
My partner and I have been in the same dynamic for over 30 years. Will this program still help?
Yes. We often think that improvement would mean that your partner would have to become a completely different person. Quite often there is a picture in our head of what a relationship should look like, and that picture might seem very far from our reality – which can make us want to give up. I approach relationships as a reflection of your ability to do self care. When you learn a new mindset and new skills, this changes how YOU feel and show up in the relationship. This in turn has a positive effect on your partner and the dynamic with them. I have guided a lot of people in long-term relationships successfully (check also my testimonials, for example that of Sandra).
Who should not take the program?
Our program is not right for those looking for help with an emotionally or physically abusive relationship, those with mental illness, those who are already in a divorce. Does it have a guarantee? Yes. We back our program with a 100% satisfaction guarantee. Here’s how it works. Participate in up to the first Module from the start of the program. If you no longer feel that Happy Love Life is right for you, send us an email. We’ll ask for your completed journal to make sure you gave it a go, and ask what didn’t work for you so we can learn and improve. Once we receive your completed coursework, you’ll get a swift and complete refund. If you do the Happy Love Life work and don’t get the value, submit your completed journal within the first 30 days, and get a full and complete refund. Simple as that.
What happens after you register for the program?
After signing up you will receive a confirmation email. You will have access to the content/videos of the program right away (modules are released once a week). You will also receive the info on how to access the Facebook Group and live calls for the premium course.
What’s the price in my currency?
What dates and times do the live calls take place where I live?
See FAQ for the prices in your currency.
Use my Tough Talk Preparation Sheet for an easy, connecting talk. Let me know where I can send it!